Total Pageviews

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

dont fall apart on me tonight

as Bob Dylan is one of my all time favorite singer songwriters, and i guess overall people, considering what he has shared and given to the world, the title above is a very nice song from 1983 that he played with another of my favorite artists on, Mark Knopfler. I was playing it tonight while feeding the last bottle of the night to our 1 month old baby girl, not only singing along, but also singing it to her with the hopes that she would obey the commands in order to give us a peaceful night, which has not really been the case since she arrived in this world, as it is with most newborns.

i rearranged the desk to how i like it, for the first time since we have been in this house, and now with the new computer, i am once again beckoned to type some keys on this here blog.

Since my last post, I purchased a watch. Kind of big news, with it being one of the staples with runners, the fact that I haven't worn one in 3 years - let alone almost 6 with one that was a gps watch, and since my second to last post was ABOUT watch-less running! suppose that may have been a subconscious signal that I was changing.

Naturally, I've been quite inquisitive and curious to run again with a time piece, and with this one being......a gps watch with the latest features for the runner, even all the more so. As would indicate, the last few weeks, despite adding a newborn baby, my running has been pretty consistently frequent. of course I can tell you, given the ease of data, about 20 miles a week with about 4 runs in a 7 day period. It's getting hot, and my energy is sometimes lower and just different with going through the changes, the speeds aren't dramatically dropping - yet they are going down (faster). So all of that playing into the mix, I am not displeased.

As i wrap this blog up, it bookends nicely with the current song playing behind me, Baby, Stop Cryin from an album previous to the opening paragraph's, 1978 Street Legal- which ALSO double bookends Bob's evangelical christian trio of albums from 1979 and 81 (also good albums), with the hopes for tonight's slumber while one month old daughter optimistically snoozes the night away.

this was a nice little post - i have more to say about running, much to begin and continue a hopeful usage of writting for what i enjoy the well being and settling nature of it, introspectively. it's kind of creative and meditative. and helpful and a staple in running like the watch...a runners log.

Sunday, April 15, 2018

time and space

Nothing makes me more convinced that time and space are relative, than running the last 10k of a marathon. While the 6 marathons have all had unique experiences, the last part of the races have all shared a similar phenomena to varying degrees.

I believe a couple things start to open up during our runs. We begin to drift and settle into a trance of repetitive footfalls, breathing, and a lull of the speed of our vision the sights passing in our periphery. Mentally, we go from quick passing miles filled with adrenaline and optimism, into a drone of steady lapse during the middle of monotonous miles, until we start to hit, fight, and make our way through and beyond "the Wall." It is here where I have felt, along with countless other runners who may testify to the existence of what seems to be almost another dimension of the aforementioned shift of experience in time and space. I cant speak for all people, or even for all times of any given runner, but nonetheless having experienced this relativeness of our universal constructs shifting, where - time seems to almost freeze into a singularity of moment, and distance seems to stretch well beyond our conditioned experience of measurement, going through these final stages we come out on the other side of the finish line a new believer into worlds just beyond the veil, only entered through pain, trust, faith, fatigue, and strength synergized between mind, body, and spirit.

It was while listening to Audrey Assad's Joy of the Lord as I mowed the lawn today, that I began to muse on a collective thought from her words in the song, "The Joy of the Lord is my Strength", along with the pastor's reading in church today from Colossians 1:11, "being strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance with patience with joy." As goes with most spiritual wisdom in the vein of counterintuitive-ness, it's not through an extraordinary portion of might or power that God gives, demonstrates, or teaches us in his showcase of strength, but it's through the ways of enduring, staying with, patience, faith, remaining, abiding, that we tap into and reflect and showcase the strength of God....that ultimately changes our trial into a joy, that is the result of a higher transformation, one that leaves us new and better, where as if we only were wielding the strength of God for our own advantage or short sighted, immature request to begin with. And so it goes, we come out of the refiners fire a better version or our self than we could dare even dream to ask going into our tribulation, trough, or dark night, that once again gives credence to God's ways being higher than ours.

the last thread that weaves into this post is drawing on the concept of time. Spiritual teachers of most traditions, including Christianity, will share that it is in the present that we can find peace. The hurt or pain of the past, and the anxiety of the future are not where we would be advised to spend our mental time. Reading C.S. Lewis The Screwtape Letters, he writes: "The Present is the point at which time touches eternity. Future is, of all things, the thing least like eternity. It is unknown,  UN-Realized. For the past is frozen and no longer flows, and the Present is all lit up with eternal rays."

When you are hitting the wall in a marathon, as time slams to a halt, and the miles stretch on like a never ending horizon, the only friend you have is the present moment. It's as if we have reached a point in our bodily and mental fatigue that has stripped away all unrealities, shedding the unnecessary weight mentally and spiritually that we can no longer bare to carry, that we come to a stark and sober clarity of the present that gets us through to the finish. Recalling what we've accomplished thus far will either leave us with regret of how we went about getting to this point of pain, or a sense of pride of having done enough as is it, that those thoughts could derail us, just as much as thinking of how far we still have to go, and how we ever are going to get there, questioning how it ever could be, is also equally as dangerous. The mantra becomes "one foot in front of the other" in a lock step of present moment that eventually we find that finish line tape.

the strength we find in our endurance of the race in a marathon, or the just as real analogous 'marathon of life', is where we ultimately find our joy in the completion of being carried through by coming face to face with the present. There isn't a strength to achieve patience, but patience is the achievement of strength. amen.

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

watchless running / Charlotte 10 Miler - Race Recap

The problem is, the more time that passes the more things I feel like i should fill in since the last post. Suppose that might be part of sensing I need to adhere to the overarching theme of this blog. But really what this writing does, for me anyway, is to conclude the fullness of the run (running produces so many thoughts - runners will understand this) where you uncork feelings sometimes adequately expressed, sometimes richer, sometimes fumbling to convey the experience - but nonetheless an outlet to give credence to the beauty of the ordinary and the magical, the painful and the soaring. And as an added bonus, in some ways it produces self motivation to have record of past experience to propel for future performance.

A running log is a staple of a runner. Metrics are vastly used in the sport during the act, and penning them is our scorecard to the days record for statistical qualifiers and missed marks, showcasing our ascent into being the best we can be. Also, honestly stating our struggles gives value to when we overcome the hardships and provides perspective to the fullness of our cycle.

My blog was humming well before I discovered Dr. George Sheehan, and when i discovered him and his works, I had let go of writing - but i have thought about practicing it again. Like he says, "never trust a thinker who is still." Running, like I said above, opens the mind for great thought and a space for the Spirit to speak. I read where a monk said that running is a little to much movement to achieve a definitive meditative state (where walking can achieve this given it's slower nature), but running comes pretty close. Of course, like with anything else, it's never guaranteed - this epiphany type state. Like our runs, where we think we are set for a great outing, we are left feeling dull and dry from time to time.

One of the thoughts I had today was, I think i want to get a running watch again. Now, i won't jump headfirst back into apparatuses and tools, but having gone almost three years watch-less, I think easing back in to something that keeps stopwatch and splits won't be too aggressive. And when i thought that i wanted a watch again, it made me think - relating back to Wonder Women which i watched the other night - where, in the movie, Wonder Women, who isn't really fully human is puzzled to discover that man subjects himself to "time". It was an interesting thought: Why do we do that? With running, we can attest that time is the biggest motivator. Knowing where the time is ticking can unleash great amounts of power we didn't suspect we had. And it made me wonder: could we still achieve the same great heights in running if time was not something we kept ourselves surrendered to? I find it hard to believe the true answer is Yes.

Watch-less running has been great though in keeping my delight in the endeavor long lasting. I haven't gotten to any point where I felt like I was weighed down by the numbers, and has taught me a good deal in listening to my body, and how I can respond with speeding up or slowing down without first deciding to upon looking at numbers. I think it was an asset in my last race, the Charlotte 10 miler just a week and a half ago.

I wanted to run faster than my last outing at this race, back in 2016, which was 109 flat. I felt like i was in similar shape, but had I watch on I would undoubtedly made it much harder to achieve the PR i did, besting that time by 2.5 mins. The first 2 miles when i asked a lady runner beside me what our time was, i was surprised. I felt okay pace wise, but was surprised to learn that I was clicking faster than my pace the previous race aforementioned.  With a watch I wouldn't have had the cushion that i earned running fast. I would have put on the breaks and succumbed to my ascribed pace, rather than being true to my body - which i was doing. 5 miles in, half way, i asked another fellow male runner our time and he said a little over 33. Well, i felt still in control, and that i Had enought to pick it up a little bit. While feeling like I was picking it up, in racing i do know that that only means you are maintaining - most of the time. So maintain i did,  and launched my to an even second half of the run, closing my race in 106.27. I was able to pick a few people off, and hold off anyone from passing me. The hill at mile 9 I tackled well, and the 10th mile I really picked it up, making up any lost time and then some, taking full advantage of the steady slight downhill straightaway.

Anyway, the word count is growing, and my eyelids are falling. Until next time.

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Chicago Marathon

without much excitement I pound these keys, but I know that I will be happy I put down my recap once memory starts to fade. Especially since I never did recap my lone Boston Marathon back in 2012, although I now have a better understanding as to why I did not.

So far I am 0-2 in the big marathons, as far as performing well. I won't go into the details of that Boston race, but suffice to say the heat got me that day, as it was one of the hottest days on record with the mercury rising to almost 90 degrees.

But as for this race just a few days ago, the main thing that played into the poor showing was my lack of self control in pacing myself from the beginning. 

coming off a strong 2016 where i raced frequently and training throughout the year, i decided, as mentioned in the previous post, to sign up for the Chicago marathon. Jan. 1st I raced, but did not keep signing up for races like i did the year prior. My running in the winter and spring was ongoing- but it was lessened as I did not have mini goals to shoot for with regular road races to keep me honest. As Spring let on, I knew I had to at some point begin to take seriously the idea that I had 26.2 miles to run this October. While I began to get more consistent in late spring into summer, life kept getting in the way, and I started to feel the reality that I was not where i needed to be mileage wise/training wise with mature preparations for the marathon. Where I typically would build up long runs to be able to tackle the mid to high teen weekend long runs, I was neglecting them until about a month to go, at which point I finally got in a 13 mile run, and only 2+ weeks ago jumped up to an 18 mile run - which actually, given the terrain (mountains in Blowing Rock) i was pleasantly surprised with. But my pace was even and slow and my legs did not feel as good as they should towards the end, but not surprising given my lack of training. 

Never mind not doing any workouts, the lack of long runs was what I came to Chicago with. My evaluation of what i needed to hit for a pace that could get me through as evenly as possible-still needing a little luck on my side for the final miles - was to run 8-815 per mile. After completing the aforementioned 18 mile long run 2 weeks prior, I got my legs fresh and was feeling as good as can be expected days before the race. 

The forecast was going to be a little warmer than ideal, so an added variable was thrown into the mix -where an email encouraging runners to slow the pace to compensate was sent out the week of. I knew their warning was legit, experiencing the heat first hand at that Boston race, and I intended not to ignore the advice. Getting into Chicago 2 days before race day, I began carb loading on deep dish pizza and pasta, and got on the hotel treadmill for an easy 2 mile shake out the day before the race. I was healthy, legs feeling good, and knew I was as ready as I could be. Still, with only averaging 4 days a week, and about 25 miles per week of running all year, I was hoping to be around 3:30-3:40 for my finishing time - which would be about 8 min per mile, and I thought if I went over 8 min per mile pace in the beginning maybe i could drop it down the second half like I did under similar training my last marathon in 2016 at New River. 

With the gun going off at 7:30, runners were encouraged to get down around 5:30-6am. The race set up was bigger than Boston, as it should be given it's a larger field by about 15-20k people. My first realization as to how big this race was was experiencing the HUGE expo the day before. The morning of the race was cool and perfect temperatures with degrees in the low 50s Fahrenheit. But we all knew it wasn't going to stay there. I drank water, chomped down a granola bar, and sucked up a gel before the race and was ready to go. 

Oh - another thing that I was aware of needing to be careful of was being in the first Wave and the first Corral (which means I was just behind the elite men and the closest to the start of the race) as the runners in these spots are going to be faster than those behind you. Throw in 40,000 runners, and you basically were stacked in with folks who would be well under 3 hours finishing all around me at the beginning. So being cautious was even more imperative to hit my pace at the start. 

The gun went off, and off we all went. The buzz was immediately felt as we started down Columbus Dr. (right past our hotel the first half mile of the race-Sheraton Grand), and seeing the swarms of spectators, let alone the throngs of runners ALL around starting off with much excitement. Right away my legs felt super fresh, springy, and light. I didn't go with the group, and tried to find a relaxed comfortable pace, hoping it would be around 8 mins per mile. Talking with my friend and fellow runner Josh Brewer the day before, I decided even if I was a little quick and under my pace the first couple miles that I could come back to where I needed to be, not wanting to waste the adrenaline that was stored up and let out the first couple of miles. When we past the first mile marker I asked a runner beside me our time, and he said 7 mins flat. Uh oh- didn't want to start out THAT much quicker. but the pace felt so easy and comfortable. I started thinking about how i felt the other marathons i ran, and i remembered they all felt easy and i had to be intentional not getting too quick - but i started to wonder - given how great i felt - if 8 miles was too conservative a target, and also - i did intend to take advantage of the buzz the first couple of miles anyway. 

The races first few miles are downtime, and the crowds are huge. As we past the first 5k maker, my time of 22:42 I knew I had slowed it a tad from 7 flat, and still feeling slow and in control I thought I was fine. Around this time, or slightly before, i think mile 2, i saw that I was in lock step with the official 3:05 pace group/leader. I remember thinking - wow - this doesn't feel hard, if i keep it up I should have a Boston Qualifying time. This NEVER was even an idea to be this fast or to shoot for such a goal, let alone even the thought of me trying to get a BQ. I should have realized here I was starting to get carried away from my plan.

On I went, and right there I stayed on pace. Looking at the 10k clock on the course I knew I wasn't slowing down, and now being 6 miles in also knew that I hadn't slowed down were I only going quicker the first few miles--i was beyond that. I was holding this pace and subconsciously and even deliberately I was staying with the 3:05 pace group, while also feeling - at this point - that I could even still go harder the second half of the race. Around mile 10 I started to think that my legs were beginning to feel slightly taxed, and that this early in the race that should not be the case. In marathons were i was smart the first 14 miles felt like a walk in the park, like i was holding myself back. While i wasn't feeling like i was pushing it, at this point, i also was not feeling like i was holding myself back either. About here I stopped to pee and lost some time, and got behind the 3:05 pack, but I didn't fret about it at least. I felt like i was definitely going to be way under 3;30 so i let it go, and around mile 11 the 3:10 back came up to me.   

taking gel at mile 5 gave me a boost, and mile 11 i did the same, and got a quick little boost again, heading into the half at 1:35. Here my legs definitely felt a more used than they should this early, but I wasn't noticeably slowing down a great deal. Soon after the half, at 25K (15.53 miles) I started to feel some slight cramping in my legs. Over the next 3 miles to where I hit 30k I slowed from 7:17 per mile to 7:25 per mile (total), meaning the last 3 miles I was over 8 min per mile pace - and i could tell. At 30k I wasn't nervous, but I was well on my to the pain effecting my mind as well. I knew I had 8 miles to go, and I felt like I was done. I had run the first 10 miles easy, the next 3 okay, and the last 5 slowing down more and more to where I was definitely in the mid 8's and feeling like I didn't have it in me to hold anywhere near a decent pace to the finish. From 30k to 35k is the area known as the Wall - for any level of marathoner, irregardless of fitness. Something about 18-20 miles is where the body starts digging to find extra stores of glycogen and nutrients as the body begins to be fully taxed. I've always felt the pain during this part of the marathon, but this time it was the worst ever. It wasn't something I knew I had to get through and just keep pushing til the finish, but this time it was - i know I'm not going to get through it and it will go away, i have to experience this crushing misery until the finish line. 8 miles of pain. 

Looking back when the fatigue and muscle cramps in the legs began the second half of the race, it's amazing how much it took out of me mentally knowing that my lack of training, and foolish pace set me up to realize that there was no way out. Had I gone my pace, and put in the training i knew this period would be temporary and my legs would have enough to hold until mile 26. Now all my mental fortitude was going to be used to not quit and drop out of the race.

from 18 miles to 21 miles I was at near a 10 min per mile pace. This stretch was where i succumbed first to walking. As bad as I felt I never wanted to walk because remembering Boston, it only made it that much harder to resume. Yet the leg pain was so intense I had no choice. Between brief spells of walking I would try and shuffle my legs. Fighting through the last 3 miles to where I went from 8 mins to 10 min per mile, at mile 21 i still had over 5 miles to go and the mental anguish was daunting. It never go easier, and only worse. From 35k-40k (miles 21-24) I went from 10 mins + per mile to 15 mins plus per mile.  One foot in front of the other is all i was trying to do. I wanted to stop, but I knew i had to stay in motion. I would think of my daughters, my wife, my dad - who ran this marathon back in 1981 and which gave me the inspiration to sign up for it- and my cousins/family who were in town and would be at the finish. I was a, and dry heaved, and the sun was only warming things up. Bananas, oranges, Gatorade, water - i was consuming as much as I could at every opportunity despite the upset stomach of my insides reeling because i knew with my body shutting down, neglecting intake of nutrients would resign me to a total collapse. With the sign reading 5k until finish i knew 3.1 miles was something I COULD push myself through, but I was doing every mental trick, prayer, and thing i could to keep going. 2 miles to go - i started shuffling more than walking but the pain was excruciating. I thought, this is hell. Where I had felt this before at Boston, it was not nearly as long (Boston only did i feel like this the last 2 miles or so). I vowed I would never come as under-trained and overconfident to a marathon again. People were seeing participants at all levels hurt, and the encouragement from some of the spectators was immensely valuable. 
I tried to stay in the moment, and visualize the end where it would all be over, and tell myself that this is temporary. The future present moment won't feel like this, and all i can do is just be present and not fight the pain but let the future come to be by moving my feet forward. 

I mile to go. As i looked back on the last several miles, i realized that space time is warped at the end of a marathon. The beginning miles tick off quickly and the end they go on forever. While technically the distance is the "same" the chemical makeup of the brain after sustained fatigue registers the miles unequally, and we are subject to this new reality. The 3:30 group had passed me somewhere after mile 20, and the 3:45 pace group passed me somewhere after mile 24. I had a glimmer of hope that I would still be under 4 hours at the finish, but even that was over weighed by just the desire to not quit. Shuffling to the end, I saw the final turns and knew I would make it. I came to the finish in 3:47:58. It was a little surprising given what I went through that I was still faster than Boston (3:54) but that was only thanks to my fast pace the first 16 or so miles. Plus Chicago being a flat and fast course, compared to Boston's hills. 

The walk from finish to family reunite area felt like forever as my mind and body were trying to normalize, taking in protein shakes, beer, water, cold rags, and aluminum blankets - simultaneously fighting chills and the need to cool down. But I had done it. I had danced with the devil, and I hadn't quit. I finished under 4 hours, and I consider the race equal parts bitter (obviously the pain/costing myself a better time had i run smarter in the beginning) and sweet (finishing the race and not quitting or dropping out). 

The marathon is a huge physical and mental test, a life experience, and I know i'm richer for having gone through it. Thank you God for keeping me safe! Amen. 

Thursday, September 28, 2017

running with the Spirit

it must have been around 2 years ago now that my watch died, and I decided not to replace it. At that time I wasn't running too much or at very high a level, and not really sensing an urge to get another watch, kept on running-without one, for the first time in my life.

Today, i still haven't replaced my watch, and i still run.

Right after i lost it and was still running, i thought i'd keep it up until I had finished the New River Marathon (May 2016) or at the end of the calendar year, and then reassess, assuming i'd probably get a watch. As i signed up for races at the beginning of 2016 to get ready for the May marathon, i was nervous to not have a watch during a race-something that's much different than just running for fun/fitness. But with clocks on the course, a good sense of my pace, and proximity to other runners with beeping watches where i could ask the time, it went fine and so i kept on racing without. Then the marathon, where i was still somewhat anxious not not have the time on my wrist as i covered 26 miles, but .... the over conservative approach to not go out too hard, especially with not having a watch, paid off, and i felt myself more free at the end to not reign it in when i really started to leave it all out on the course the last 10k of the 26.2 mile course. And so, i kept it going through 2016, and up to now with no foreseeable time that i might get back to the world of running watches.

2017 has been different than 2016 in that i haven't raced (other than the New Years trail race), so i haven't thought about a watch as much but i have been running despite not stepping up to a starting line. At the end of last year, i decided to make the plunge and register for the Chicago marathon this Oct. 8th 2017. I was admitted via their lottery, and have been confirmed as a participant since the beginning of this calendar year. With that, my goal of 26.2 has been in my sights for the entirety of this 2017 to date. I ran, infrequently during the months of Jan-April, and in May started to try and get a little more regular with getting a run in. June came, and I became more regular still. Since the beginning of the summer i have kept it consistent at about 3.5 - 4 times a week average at about 20-30 miles per week.

Only last week did I hit over 40 miles, and also only last week did i finally turn in a long run that was over 14 miles...hitting 18 miles at the Moses Cone/Trout Lake trails.

as well as ditching the watch, i also have ditched the weblog of writing for my handwritten journal. It's served me well, but i do miss the ease and quickness of weblogging my runs and also the ability to fire at the keys to help jog the mind with writing. I've thought about getting a Google Chromebook for easy access to keyboard writing, and i might need to take the plunge, as part of my departure from this website and turning to the paged journal was not having a decent laptop at home and reducing my office time from entries such as this!

While i've gone much more Zen/Old School with my running and writing, I do plan on trying to recap more runs/entries on running in the future because seeing what i did in the past still can serve me today when i want to remember what i did, and how it went. The past can be helpful for the present and the future, as well as just the act of recording and writing can help keep the mental cobwebs off. But another aspect is that a journal is vital to the process of contemplation/listening/understanding/gleaning wisdom, much of which comes from our times alone out on a run. And so there has been some that i have missed from not recording, and I hope to at Least get back to hitting the highlights, and capturing the experience of the Chicago Marathon that goes off 9 days from now.

but as for today, had a nice 30 min shake out recovery run, with keeping the tank full for my last "long(semi)" run tomorrow.

Wednesday, May 11, 2016

New River Marathon 5/7/16--3:27:17

Fitting, perhaps, that my return to the marathon distance was with a race with "New" in the name. In a lot of ways, this dedicated block of life - the decision to sign up, train, and experience in the event itself - was something "New", from my approach in training, and my circumstance in life, even though I had experienced the marathon four times prior.

It was in December with Avery's upcoming 5 year old birthday - itself a milestone that just rings of an age that is stepping into childhood with more independence - that i realized my days are precious and ticking where my kids will have a chance for some memories of their father while they are young and impressionable. And so since I hadn't really been too active in committed running and racing since Boston in 2012, i knew i had to sign back up for a race and get things moving again. I looked up late Spring marathons which would give me enough time to train, and found one that not only fit my date target, but also had some icing on the cake in that it was in the mountains, near Boone, picturesque, and along a route that we did workouts in while I was on the cross country team at Appalachian State University. What's not to love?!

I won't recount my training here as this is mainly a race - recap, but during this entire training and through the race itself my approach has been different that it ever has in my life of running. When my GPS watch was lost I didn't replace it, i just used a regular stop watch. When that died, i stopped wearing a watch all together - this was about a year ago. So when my "training" began in earnest I stuck to form and didn't ever wear a watch. Also, going into the race I set aside time goals, as I just wanted to reclaim the fitness to complete 26.2 miles without having to walk, where i could compete the distance at a suitable jog/run pace-so getting there was mainly just building a base. I didn't incorporate any workouts, but what i did do back in Dec. was look to sign up for a race every month of the year leading up to it so i would then have some familiarity of pushing myself. Lastly, in a spiritual sense, I got some running books for Christmas that provided me a great orientation to looking at running in a more holistic way of benefit to mind body and spirit, which really opened me up to new awareness and contemplation while running. (Running with the Mind of Meditation...and Running and Being---both i highly recommend)  This all was very rewarding and made the training more attractive and steered off the dregs of drudgery and duty.

Anyway from previous posts on Cooper River Bridge Run, Trail Half Marathon, and me telling you here I also did a 10 miler in Feb, an 8k and a 4 miler in Jan. I had some races under my belt, and had hit my 20 mile run two weeks prior to the marathon thus completing my requisite training. The races were fun and i was able to pass people the second half of each with good negative splits, so i was learning to not go out too hard and to find the next gear and push myself towards the end, and got my long runs in with a 14-17-20 mile Sundays in consecutive weeks, although my 20 mile run was rough (made it through 18 but had to walk jog the last two) and took me 3 hours! After that, my rest was good and I stayed with my recovery and maintenance runs during the taper 2 weeks before the race. I noticed my legs had fully recovered and were feeling like "spring loaded rockets" on the shake out runs of Wednesday and Friday before race Saturday.

I was getting excited the week of, because I knew it was going to be a great course and that I would enjoy getting to participate in it more because my good good friend Josh Brewer was also coming to do it as well. He had just run Boston 3 weeks prior but was stoked and said he was feeling recovered enough to be looking forward to it as well. Quite amazing to do 2 marathons in 3 weeks! Also, i was looking forward to the race because my family was coming up and we were going to hang out in Boone before and after which is always a treat. My girls were going to get to watch me and be with me, making it very special.

I really carb loaded for this race. I slept well too leading up to it. I was healthy, not even battling any nagging injuries or even slight illnesses. I was going to need all i could get with my limited mileage. My highest mileage was 35 miles, which i did those last 2 weeks before the taper when i had my 20 and 17 mile long runs. I averaged about 4 days a week running, and would go about 45-65 mins so i was nearing the edge of "trained" and "not sure if i could make 26" - which is always fun :)

 Josh Brewer said he wanted to run along with me. That was great, Not only would it help me mentally with making the race go by quicker and easier with me feeding off him, but i was just glad to experience the day with a good friend, one who I've shared a running bond since 1998.  As he picked me up and drove us to the race that morning, i realized 25 mins before the start that I had forgotten my race number. This was crucial because my timing chip was on there, and without it i wouldn't register as a participant, thus making my entry fee for naught, let alone the ability to see my name and time after months of training. I called my wife and explained and she rushed over with my number just making it before the gun. Whew. Big shout out to her, what a save! This also explains the mood going into the race. Of course being low on great expectations, no watch, and the nonchalance of not even bringing my vital documents to line up to race, the mood was pretty slack. I was literally pinning my number to my shirt as we started on that first mile, and stuffing my energy gels and chews into my pockets while running. Josh decided to forgo the watch also, so we literally we just out there relying on internal clocks and feel, at the same time traveling down a course neither of us had been on nor exactly knew what to expect or lay ahead. it really was pretty adventurous and exciting, and not only that, we both were extremely chatty because of our excitement, and it seemed like we were just out for a Sunday stroll, as opposed to being in the vortex of a quarter of a years culmination of time and effort. In fact, after 3 miles I said - i think we better be quiet for a while and find the zone - but for whatever reason i thought, no - this is good - let it be natural because this is really going to help later in the race when it does seem like we have been out there for a while, so i need to embrace this early ease of doing business.

Legs felt good, pace felt comfortable, and the miles were ticking by effortlessly. We made a turn away from the New River about 4 miles in and hit our first hill climb. YES! i was excited about this and we both got up without hindrance and kept out easy pace.  We continued on, talking about running form, old friends, and silly jokes that suddenly came to mind from the past or present. Mood was light and were talked about the gratefulness of the natural beauty and the volunteer support in this race, feeding off the good vibes.  Josh got be on track with drinking liquids at just about every stop. I had been taking Sport Jelly Beans throughout the first third of the race, and around mile 8 or 9 i took my first Gel, after we climbed the second hill. This was steep, but welcomed as it provided a change of pace from the flatness that paralleled the river. We always were in sigh of other runners around us, although it was far from crowded. The race probably only fielded about 300 participants in the Full and Half together. As we made a loop back to the start/finish we passed our first crowd support. then we were back to the quietness of the course, onto the second loop.

Mile 10 i took stock of how my legs felt, and noticed they were beginning to feel a little wear which is to be expected after 10 miles. But i was good. No pains or nags, and cardio was still good because Josh and I remained conversational. Another gel around mile 14 along with waters and Gatorade along the way every couple of miles. Oh - the weather was perfect - 50 degrees and clear. Beautiful.
I remember us saying that we were almost kind of sad that the race was already half over, because we wanted to enjoy the experience as long as we could. Probably from our duration at that point, our minds and talks shifted to more spiritual, scientific, and  philosophical chats. I think this happens in the runners mind after the mind and spirit open up from the blood flow and movement, but we were able to put these to word together since we were side by side keeping our minds on the moment rather than at this point pushing for any time. We were bereft of competitive tendencies at this point.

We passed a group of volunteers handing out water who told us that we would see them again in 7 miles as we were on the loop which we would return back to the finish. After continuing down the road further we made a left and were leaving the river and going into the woods on a dirt road. This was about mile 17. The soft ground felt good from the pounding we were piling up from the pavement, and the air felt cooler as we entered into the trail surrounded by trees and foliage. The road, being away from the river, rose and we began to climb our third and last hill of the course. The beginning was rolling, and Josh and I were side by side here, but as it rolled the terrain started to send me into a different pace where I was beginning to speed up on the hills - i think subconsciously because i needed to handled them mentally in a quick way so i could concentrate back on the flat rhythm that would be there for the last 6 miles. As rolled along the easy hills of the trail, I found myself ahead of josh for the first time all day, and then came to the paved main hill on this last climb, where I decided I needed to keep it up because slowing down on the hill would prove to throw me off my pace and maybe unsettle my race. So I pushed that last hill and passed people, many of whom were subjected to walking up it - and once crested, saw the steep descent down with a pair of runners ahead that were moving well that i potentially could catch. I knew that the hill was an area I could tackle better than most given my long legs for a runner, so I used the downhill to open up my stride and try and catch them while putting distance behind my competitors. Yes, this is definitely when my competitive juices started flowing.

Once i was back on the flat loop heading towards the finish, immediately there was the 20 mile marker, signifying 10k to go until it was all over. Regardless of my lead on Josh at this point, I decided that I was in race mode and wanted to make these last 6 miles focused and competitive to see how many people i could catch ahead of me, and to come to the finish line feeling like i gave it my all. This is where runners experience the "Wall" as it's commonly known that at 20 miles the ballgame changes, and some runners succumb to lactic acid and fatigue so great that their last miles are a bit of a death march. I have experienced that - my last marathon in Boston 2012. And even when you don't "bonk" from my other marathons I have found the last 6 miles a true test of will and determination, where I have fought serious fatigue, and natural slow in pace even if it's not the wheels coming off, and even bouts of nausea and disorientation that one deals with during 20-26. Yet here, I was not only mentally coming into peak form, but physically my legs were responding to my demands of picking it up, and I was able to execute what my mind was telling me to do. Something I have not experience so well in any marathon I have done. This is surprising given I couldn't even run 20 miles 2 weeks before, but I think made possible from the early looseness of body, mind, and spirit from running with Josh those first 18 miles.

And so I pushed on. I passed the 20 mile drink stop without taking one but did ingest my last energy food. I started reeling in runners who were classically slowing down at this juncture, and passed water stop where I consumed my final time with some water and Gatorade. 4 miles to go. Ever since entering back onto the loop from the hill, a strong headwind and developed that we were facing that made things really like you were literally fighting the air. It felt like a bout with nature, self, and competitors on the course. Yet I was winning this fight. I don't know my pace from not having a watch but it felt so much faster than before. I was not only gaping Josh - who I don't think fell off his pace, just that I had found another gear (and also i do think the reality of him racing a marathon 3 weeks prior is something you are not fully recovered from to the deepest of damaged bodily makeup), but passing everyone I saw in front. With 2 miles to go I started playing games with my head where I would find a spot in front, just run to there i told my self, and then do it again, to help make the mile go by. It was coming true, something Josh and I talked about earlier in the race, where early miles feel like they are so short, and late miles feels never ending - yet they are measured the same. Perception is a funny thing, especially when you are in different states of fatigue. One mile to go. I knew I would make it and not fall apart. While I felt real confident that last 10k, I did have a sliver of "what if" where I might go to hard and then just totally hit a wall and have to walk/struggle in way off pace. But I could tell i was home free and this wouldn't happen. Less than a mile to go, a man who had done the half was encouraging runners, and gave me a visual marker of the last bend before i would see the finish. I ran to it, then saw the finish, then strode into my last yards where I saw my family who looked quite surprised to see me so soon. I remember I was just smiling with Joy the last few miles because I was running my best in such late stages and feeling like i was conquering all i set out to do.

It was the surprise of the day as to what the clock would show when i got in eyesight of it, and the surprise was pretty great in that I was much faster than I thought I might finish. 3 hours, 27 minutes. An overall pace of 7:54 per mile. Exceeding my expectation thoroughly. I know we had some easy mid 8 min miles, so closing the gap really pushed my overall pace per mile down, and i'm glad it was below 8 minutes. This was a little of a redemptive race from Boston where I literally went to Hell and back, but also a major step back into my loved world of running that gave me such a boost this 2016 from training day one to finish of marathon. And even after the race I felt great. I had energy, could walk, and wasn't dying - like i typically had felt after all the other marathons.  Josh came in 2 places behind me, and he closed very well passing just about all the ones we had in front after the hill as well. What a joy the race was all in all. Something i won't forget.

 Now, I'm ready to get back on the roads later this week and continue the journey. I'd like to continue doing one race a calendar month. For now, I'm thinking of doing a 10k here in Charlotte I found June 25th. Maybe I'll throw in some faster shorter runs to prepare now that i have a base, and see if this competitive bugs comes back out to play!

Monday, April 4, 2016

Cooper River Bridge Run

with a light week of training between the books ends of March's last weekend Half Marathon Trail race and April's first of the CRBR 10k yielded a light week of basketball Monday, 45 mins easy running Tuesday and then full body massage to get the soreness out, 30 mins light running Wednesday, and off on Thursday. Friday was also an off day from running, but was a good night of Pasta, beer, and chilling with Josh Brewer down in James Island, SC. 

never being a morning person, Saturday's wake up came harsh and fast. Was feeling very full from the night before's diet, so didn't attempt any food - which proved to be non detrimental. Legs felt pretty fresh during the shake out - but being in the first wave, i was nervous i was going to go out too fast and not be able to hold a steady pace, so i over protected and regulated myself to comfort that first mile. Still, the shock of not being inside a race for more than an hour seemed to take a while for me to get the notice that i had to start moving. That notice came basically the second half of the race.

How the course lays out - you have that first mile which can be hard with the crowds in general, and where i wanted to go slow (i wanted 630 split and 630 split is what i got)-then the second mile you are just trying to gear up for the bridge so you don't really drop it too much - at least i didn't. i tried to maintain but basically with the split coming just a little bit into the bridge's climb,  i ticked off a 640 mile so was behind the ideal race plan already. The third mile ( the uphill bridge climb) came with a strong left to right wind that really slowed things down. I realized my legs were obviously groomed to make the distance, but the pace was already taxing me, and the hill i started to drift mentally at times. When that happens it's sure to spell a slowdown. and it did, so i rattled off my worst mile of the day at 720 and just trying to hold on and crest the bridge. The bridge is a lot of ways is it's own entity. It's why i love the race. It impacts the first 2 miles, the 3 and 4th mile are all on the bridge basically, and with it's hill, wind, and energy it's a complete obstacle that must be dealt with. 

I think also the long distance marathon training hasn't prepared me well to mentally engage in a race in the first couple of miles, like you have to in the 10k. So once i got over the bridge hill and crossed my 5k split in 21.15 i knew i had sacrificed so much time that i wouldn't be able to get it all back. Those seconds and minutes were gone at the expense of not being ready mentally from the gun, and handling the bridge climb poorly that day. However, i had a lot of running left in me and started to lock in with my mind. 

the 4th mile we started to descend the bridge and i was able to start staying on pace with the people around me rather than get passed like i had been the previous mile. as i started to get in a groove, we hit the 4th mile mark where i brought it down to about a 650, and mentally was starting to get competitive with only 2 miles to go. I thought about having 2 miles to go last week in the trail race and how i was at that point really treating it like the final push, so i did the same here. I started to pass people and quicken my stride to combat some extra heaviness i felt in my non-thinking stride. the shorter pace and wearing my road flats made me feel light, and so did coming up on people's shoulder and passing them by. And yet, from the top of the bridge where a tall large young man in american flag bandanna and american flag racing shorts had strode out past me, he and i remained in sight and near each other the rest of the way. 

The music on the course would give me surges, and i knew i was starting to feel that old familiar boost of adrenaline coming into the last mile. i was excited to run that last mile because that 5th mile i was bringing down the pace even more to a 635 and feeling the vibes as the last mile is lined with loud spectators as you round into King street for the peak of the pageantry and energy. This is where the race feels like Boston (or i'm sure NY or Chicago-  but i just haven't done those...yet). with 40k people the crowds of runners and fans are huge, and it's like you are running down a hall way of straight flat ground where your vision becomes tunnel and your thoughts are just flying down as fast as you can until the end. The last mile .2 of the race ends with two quick turns, by which time i was already in 5th gear, so i used the previous experience to keep up the pace, and put in a good kick on the last straight to the finish, where here a young early 20s looking woman came up with me and went stride for stride with me in one of the fastest finishes i have ever done. i wouldn't let her take it so we just ended up going all out, like we were racing a 100m dash. It sure feels good to have that much in the tank at the end and finish so strong. it's like birding the 18th hole after a not so good round overall, that keeps you coming back. i clocked about a 545 last mile.

All the splits were done off recalling the time clocks on the course. I still don't wear a watch when i run, and that includes racing. 

Time: 41.03--6:36 pace
first 5k 21:15--6:30, 6:40, 7:20---6:49 pace
last 5k 19:47--6:50, 6;30, 5:50---6:22 pace